Cleared . .

Not much time to write but I went to the Doctor today. It has been one week since my surgery. He gave me the green light to do whatever I want.

I, however, am not going to rush in to anything. Everything I read on the internet (because the internet is always right) talks about people waiting months and months before running.

I haven't exercised for 8 days now. If I can hold out a little longer, I would like to take atleast the rest of the month off.

This is what I have been listening to:

Her name is Agnes Obel

Survived.

Survived.

Home.

The bigger feat than having knee surgery today was not having any coffee . . .!

I have 5 lbs of bandages on me now so I haven't been able to see the damage. And though I won't be running tomorrow - I'll be a day closer.

More tomorrow.

Nervous.

2 1/2 hours I go in for my surgery.

I am nervous.

I ran Saturday and yesterday. I don't know when I am going to be able to run again.

However, I am getting this surgery  so that I will be able to run again . .without constant pain in my knee. For me, running is nothing more than a constant trading of pain. Once this knee is fixed, hopefully it will be a break and let the OTHER parts of my body trade the pain.

Next time I write I will be being missing part of a meniscus. . . .

3 Days

On Monday at noon I am going in for my surgery.

With the demands of my work, I plan on getting up early on Tuesday and getting on the road. Like everything else, I wish that I could postpone this a week. . .

I am tempted to sign up for a marathon tomorrow. Something that shows me that there is light at the end of the tunnel . . .or life after the end of the scalpel. In all honesty, I am not really scared of the pain. This surgery should be a piece of cake as compared to the 3 hour knee surgery I had in 2001. I am a little saddened that this procedure is just a foreshadow of more problems that are going to come my way . . . .when I was 9 I didn't have knee problems.

Yes, I have been running. Only a couple of times a week. . . . only once this week. I am going to run today and tomorrow. What? I should be careful? I could tear my meniscus and have to have surgery?

Ouch

I have run the past several days and haven't really felt much in my knee.

4.5 miles today . . . NOW I remember why I am having knee surgery!!!

Over sixty degrees here on the first of December . . . .I would have found a way to run today regardless of how tattered and torn I was/am.

Torn

Torn
Meniscus
Surgery
December
10th

Ran today at 5:45AM
Dark
Cold
No music
Of course nothing hurt! My knee will probably quit hurting now! The same way that the car doesn't make the noise in front of the mechanic. The same way that the baby or the puppy doesn't do the funny thing in front of the audience.

I am really ready to get back into shape. I am gaining weight and am starting to snore at night.
My wife is very supportive. She too has decided that running makes me a better man!!!

It's getting close . . .

MRI results on Monday.


I don't have the results right now so I am going to run downtown right now . . .!

20 degrees.

Bought a pair of Saucony thermal running pants last winter that are going to make their November 2012 debut.

This is the song that it is going to be bouncing in my head:

Update...

My MRI got moved up to Monday.
I will find out my fate the following Monday with a consult with my doctor.

I have been running about every other day.
Only a couple of miles but enough to keep the demons at bay!

This morning I ran in East Peoria and then ran over the bridge into Peoria. I realize that Peoria is not Paris but it is all I got! It felt incredible. The last time that I ran across a REAL bridge was in March with my brother in Boston. Running "up" a bridge (this one wasn't flat) . . .almost feels like taking off for flight. I loved every step of my run today.
I took this picture with my phone.

I got my fix . . .

7:30AM

2.5 mile run

I got my fix for the day. My knee didn't kill me. Three hours later it's still not killing me.
I can breathe again.

When I run it is like I am shooting some sort of drug directly into my veins. . .

Those of you who run know what I am talking about.

It is going to rain tomorrow. I am going to run in it. If my knee is screwed up - -it is screwed up. A little rain might be good for it  !!!

3AM THOUGHTS

SIMPLE           PURE           RAW

That is what running is to me. . . .SIMPLE      PURE        RAW

 Left to my own devices . . . .I am none of these.

Interestingly, I would use these adjectives to describe God.

I don't have running right now . . . .but I do have God. Believe me, he has been  talking to me about my over-dependence on running and how it has defined me. HE wants to  me. . I 

Pushing to go under the knife . . .

For insurance reasons if I am going to have surgery, I need to have it before the end of the year.

I am going to see if we can get moving on this thing.

My "piss on it" attitude had me sprinting for a half mile down the middle of one of the busiest streets in my town on Sunday. Five days later my knee still growls.

I have been working out. I have been doing the elliptical. I have been going insane. . .

I was on the road 1500 miles this week, had 250 phone calls, 400 emails and not a single mile under my feet to shake it all off with.

THIS SONG IS ONE OF MY NEW ANTHEMS.
OATS IN THE WATER - BEN HOWARD
It is what I work out to. It is what I am going to run to. It is what I listen to when I think about myself getting back on the dark streets pounding out miles, years, hurt . . . .

I ran today . . . .

I ran today and I don't care if my meniscus tore a little more!

1.5 miles

I floated.

I sweat.

It was if God came down and pushed me along.

My mind is clearer. My heart is clearer.

I am convinced that I have to have knee surgery anyway. I am calling this week to schedule an MRI.
I have came to the conclusion that if he has to go inside my knee anyway . . . .a couple miles more here and there isn't going to change anything!

I am going to sleep good tonight. . .

We went to the IHSA Cross Country Championships today. I LOVE the sound of competition. . .

I purposely don't have a spot on this blog for comments . . . mostly so that those of you who follow this can't publicly call me an idiot!!! However, those of you who run know exactly what it feels like to run after a long absence. It was if I was shooting LIFE directly into my veins again.

This is the song that is dancing in my head today:
Grouplove

 

And for the record . . . .even though my knee may be pissed at me for a couple of days . . .it was worth it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tonight . . .

Tonight our 6 year old daughter told me that she would rather say that Maggie (the dog we just lost) passed away instead of died. She said that passed away makes her feel happy inside  - died makes her feel sad. I think she is right . . .

My knee hurts. That is not a good sign. A cortisone shot is pretty much supposed to numb everything - -unless it is bad.  I have a strange feeling that this is worse than I want it to be.

I have been working out every day. Surprisingly I have not gained any weight. It has been a long time since I have ran. I am sad. I miss the "me" that greeted the morning in the dark. I miss the "me" that would sweat, and stretch on the brick wall down the street. I miss the "me" that would drink water for strength and survival - - - I plain miss "me." I miss being a little on edge stepping out into the dark morning and talking to my God about keeping me safe. I miss planning my weekend runs. The leaves came and went and not once did I get to run in them, or smell them. I understand that I sound like a bad Hallmark card . . .but those of you out there who run . .you know what I mean.

Honestly, I am scared that my knee is so shredded that I may not be able to run again without pain. I am doing the best that I can (after all, nobody is dying here) by working out and doing the stupid elliptical . . . .but I MISS ME. I had to go to the store to get Outside magazine because if I can't have adventure then I need to read about it. I will not go down gracefully. I will fight this thing to the end. I understand that I am 43 years old . . .but I have more marathon type adventures left in me. THAT man is the man that my wife, children, family and friends need - - -that is the guy that I am trying to find . . .without running.

Listening to this today: Michael Kiwanuki
This is ALL I listened to in Mexico.

Ugh . . .

7:00pm

I am so wired right now I am tempted to putting on my running shoes and sprint for about 45 seconds. I feel like I just shot Starbucks in my veins. Not long ago these legs were doing 30 to 40 miles per week. Now they do zero.

The only people who understand this are people who are fed by the same sickening fuel. It has been a long time since I have had the adrenaline rush, the blood rush, the sweat rush, the endorphine rush that only running can provide. 

I am going to try to wait until 2 weeks from Thursday to run. . . .

I have been lifting weights. It sucks.

Thankful

Thankful that I get it . . .

Where I'm At . . .

Haven't ran in a long, long time.

My wife is gone for the weekend so it is me and my kids. We eat crap and spend money on things we don't usually spend money on.

Our son runs in Sectionals tomorrow.

Since my wife is gone and my son too . . . I won't be able to workout today or tomorrow.

I have been doing alot of research on bikes. . .

I am to the point where I am almost ready to make an agreement with God that says, "if you heal this knee soon, I won't ever run more than 7 miles." I've made those promises and have broke them before! However, that was a long time ago when I used to drink too much and would make agreements with God as I was curled over the toilet throwing up! Like you haven't . . .

My knee is numb. I don't know if it's the shot, the pills or time. Regardless, I feel like I could run forever. I am, however, being patient.

I am digging this right now:
Craig Cardiff - -Dance Me Outside

Saturday evening . . .

Good day.
Our son's team qualified for Sectionals in Cross Country. I am proud of him. He is a freshman and has ran every race on the varsity team. He finishes back of the pack but the experience he is getting right now by getting his butt whipped at this young age is worth a ton by the time he will be a junior and senior.

The shot has not started working. The little voice in my head tells me that my knee is so shredded that a little medicine shot into my kneecap and some pills aren't going to make much of a difference. I am afraid that the little voice might be "reason" this time. In all honesty, the thought of going yet ANOTHER day without running is suffocating.

I am not sure what I am going to do. I understand that if I have knee surgery it will be minor compared to the 3 hour knee surgery that I have already had . . . .it is not the surgery that I am worried about . . . .it is the realization that I am wearing my body out. Regardless of my faith, I have a hard time coming to grips with my own mortality. And I would guess . . . .if people were REALLY honest with themselves, I'm not the only one.

For those of you who read this that I do not know . . . .I understand that I have a tendency of writing about some of the more honest, darker shades of life! For those that KNOW me, I am also a great "liver" of life. I am just at the point in my life where if getting older bothers then it bothers me . . .no more games. If I'm pissed, I'm pissed. If I'm scared, I'm scared. The one thing that I won't die of is keeping things inside . . .including love. God has a plan . . . .

Friday Night . . .

Chili with some friends.
High School football.

Saturday
Cross Country Regionals
College football . . .will probably go to the Knox game with my offspring.

Sunday
Church
NFL Football

Monday
Bears game.

The medicine is starting to numb my knee. One year ago I would take that as a sign to go out and rip off 5 miles. . .I miss THAT guy.

This is the CD I listened on my drive home tonight:

Gregory Isakov

Torn . . . .

Went to the Doctor today.

He suspects a torn meniscus.

I got a corizone shot. In 43 years I have never had a shot in my knee.

From what I understand, a torn meniscus never really heals itself and surgery doesn't always work.

We are going to see if the shot reduces some of the inflammation. If the knee still gives me problems in a month . . . .surgery might be the next decision.

As for running?

We'll see . . . . .

However . . . . . . . .I am not dying as a result of my knee. My family loves me and I love them. I am going to heaven as a result of grace . .. . and the Bears are on their way to another winning season!

Doctor Today . . .

Worked out again this morning.
I got home from the Y at 6:15AM and sat in my parked  car in the street for a moment.
If things went as planned I would be running in the Des Moines Marathon this weekend. I looked out at the street and saw visions of me returning home after a run. This would have been a short 3 mile run today just to stretch the legs out. I am a long ways from 26.2 miles right now. I have a Doctor's appointment today at 8:30AM.

Make no mistake . . . I know that I am not dying here. I mean, I am dying but not because of my knee. There are 30 million other people in the world who have it worse off than me...

Ugh . . . .

I have worked out 9 times in the last 7 days.

The buzz is not even remotely the same as running.

I have resigned myself to the fact that the Doctor is going to have to schedule an MRI on Thursday. I also recently changed my insurance so I am really looking forward to paying the first $4,000 out of my pocket.

I am going to the Y again tomorrow. I am going to use this time away from running to really work on my overall fitness. I am not very good at being injured. I don't have all of the time in the world left in my life. Every day that I am sidelined is one more day that I get older. The same holds true for you . . .whatever it is you wanted to do today and couldn't - or didn't.

Funny . . . .

Those of you who read the last couple sentences of my post yesterday . . .joke is on me. Didn't spell check . . .changed it to protect the innocent!

This sucks . . .

1 mile around the track.
I limped the last 2 laps.
5 hours I am really paying the price.
My knee seems to be locking up.
I feel like a slob.
My body is used to burning 500 calories before the sun comes up and 1,000 to 2,000 on Sunday mornings..

Take that away and see what happens.
I've been lifting weights at the Y every day but that is not the same for me.

Crazy how just a few weeks ago I ran 20 miles and now I can't make it around the track 4 times. I could withstand the pain for 3 or 4 miles if I knew that I wasn't causing further damage.

Mark this post down as a bitch session because that's what it is . . . .I spent my whole summer training for something that seems a million years away.

All I want to do is beat the crap out of myself on the road again, sweat, perservere, overcome, defeat . . .all of the stuff that running gives you. Instead, I am going to head to the pantry and get another cookie!

I'm still kickin' . . .

I have received hate mail.
I have been told that every day I am losing followers.
I have been told that I am going to be taken out of certain people's wills.
Yesterday I was driving home and a plane flew overhead pulling a sign that simply read: YOU SUCK DOUG.

All of this hate . . . .because I haven't written on this blog for awhile.

I am back and make this promise to you faithful followers. For the next 30 days I will post something. I don't want anymore hate mail. I don't want to lose followers - I want to lead. I can't afford to be taken out of wills. I don't want to look 12,000 feet in the air and see my name being drug behind a beat up 1974 Cessna airplane. I was told that if I did not post something every day for the next 30 days that my "Blog of the Year" nomination would be in jeapardy.

I haven't been running.
I have an appointment on Thursday with the Doctor who did my first knee surgery.
I believe that I am injured. My guess would be that I have a torn MCL.
I feel like I have gained 19 pounds in the past week.

But . . . . . . . I love my family. I am going to heaven. The Bears are having a winning season . . . .and I'm not going to get any more hate mail!

New stuff tomorrow . . . . . . . . .

I have been listening to the new The Avett Brothers album. This is one of my favorites:

I'm not so sure . . . .

I ran 3.5 miles this dark, early morning.

I stumbled over a dead possum.

I felt good my whole run.

At about noon today (6 hours after my run) my bad knee started aching again. It is like a tooth ache on the inside of my knee. I am a little concerned that it could be something more than tendonitis.


It is a pretty hopeless feeling knowing that I will have a "last" run.
It is a pretty hopeless feeling when your body doesn't do what it used to do . .doesn't look like it used to . . .doesn't work the way it once did . .. I don't mean this in a vanity type of way, not even in an athletic type of way . . . just a human type of way. Life is moving far too fast for me right now. Not just my life .. but my wife's life and my kids' life . . .I wish that I could "pause" things right now.

I found this quote yesterday and it may be (other than the promises in the bible) the closest thing to truth (for me) that I know.

This is where I am . . .

I ran today for the first time since last Monday. This is the longest that I have gone without running for years and years and years and years . . . .

I ran 2.2 miles this morning at 5:30AM.
No music - - -just the moon and my labored breathe. The chest cold that I have had for the past week makes for interesting sounds . . . .

I am going to run again tomorrow. The tendonitis in my right knee seems to be very happy with me for taking time off. Tendonitis as a whole does not usually slow me down but when it is in the knee that I have had surgery on it nerves me.

I am not running in the Des Moines Marathon. I think that people were thinking that I would change my mind . . .I am not going to change my mind.

20 weeks of marathon training and you throw it all away because of a little tendonitis, a chest cold, a big toenail that is about to completely come off  and a dead dog?! Yep!

For now, I am going to continue to enjoy my morning moonlight runs, a right knee that is not pissed at me all of the time and the memory of my first marathon . . .because after all, I HAVE ran 26.2 miles . . .just not THIS time.

For those of you . . .

For those of you who follow this, let me give you a quick update.

I was in Mexico last week so I didn't write. I ran. I just didn't write.

I have tendonitis something fierce right now in my bad knee (the one that I had ACL/Meniscus surgery on).

It doesn't really hurt when I run . .however I really pay for it when I am finished. Simple things like laying on the beach last week were so miserable I couldn't even sleep.

I am not going to run in the Des Moines Marathon next month. I am in my 19th or 20th week of training but I think I need to pull the plug for several reasons. I'll write about those reasons later.

Our dog of almost 16 years died a couple of days ago. My heart is very heavy and very sad and at this time even running doesn't help. When my heart hurts I usually run . . it isn't really helping this time. Or . . .when a run does help, my damn knee hurts when I am finished!

In the meantime .. I am going to rest my knee by working out at the Y and running short distances. I am going to wallow in my own self pity over our dog . .and when I am done wallowing . .I will put my big boy pants on and get back at it.

More later.

20 miles . . .

I am back from doing 20 miles. This was my experience:

Mist over a bean field
Rising Sun
Attempted dog bite - -successful kick in the little doggie jaw.
Hills
Pain
More hills
More pain
If I didn't hit the wall at mile 19 it sure resembled the one that I hit in my marathon a year ago. If there ANOTHER wall - -I don't want to hit it.
SLOW.
After mile 7 I once again just focuses on pain management.
Like all long runs . .this one too was bittersweet with conversations with God, self epiphanies and attacks from the enemy to stop running . .to stop living . .to stop being a good husband . .etc . . . you face alot of battles when you run long distances.
4 GELS
30 ounces of water
Hot bath
we'll see how the rest of the day stacks up.

5:30AM - 20 miles in 20 minutes

5:30AM
45 degrees
body full of water, carbs and butterflies
I am going to run 20 miles this morning
If I THINK about it, I get hesitant . . .so I'll just DO it.

I tried to eat decent yesterday. I drank close to 100 ounces of water. I ran 3 miles around the track just to remind my legs what running felt like (I took Thursday and Friday off to try to mend some tendonitis.)

I shall return . .

I'm still kicking . .

I'm still kicking.

I'm still kicking out the miles.

I have tendonitis in a big way.

I write for a living and haven't been very inspired to write on this thing.

I am going to run 8 miles on Saturday and 20 miles on Sunday.

Somebody asked me today why I am doing a second marathon - - I didn't have an answer.

I am convinced that the real battle is going to come at mile 21! It is mile 21 that I cannot prepare for!

I weigh 177.

I love my wife.

I have had alot of people ask me to pray for them when I run. I am honored.

Last week a coyote ran only 15 feet in front of me. It was so close that I could hear his claws scratch against the pavement.

I am currently waiting for 2 albums to come out . .the new Killers album and the new Mumford and Sons. Both will make their way onto my marathon playlist. This is the song that stirs me of late:
It is by "Passenger"

8 miles 12 hours ago . . 18 miles in 30 minutes

5:40AM

8 miles yesterday . . .I wore my trail shoes. It once again poured rain on me for 5 minutes. 5 minutes was long enough to get everything waterlogged so I felt like I was lugging around 250 pounds.

In 30 minutes I am going to run 18 miles. My knees hurt. My feet hurt. I truly am not looking forward to this. I know, however, that about a half mile into the run I am going to start feeling alive.

My plan is this:

GELS at 3.5   7    11 and about 14 miles

I ate spaghetti, lasagna and manicotti last night and a bowl of oatmeal.

I will drink 22 ounces by mile 14 and then fill up again for the final 4 miles. I don't want neglect of nutrition and hydration to be the factors that cause me to stumble . . .here's the deal . . .after mile 7 my body starts to ache anyway . . I want it to ache because of the running not because I was too lazy to give it energy.

18 miles .. ready or not...

Saturday . . .

I postponed my 8 mile run today.
I am going to run 8 tomorrow and 18 on Labor Day.
Remnants from a hurricane have moved their way this far north and have dumped our area with rain off and on for the last 15 hours.

I didn't skip because of the rain. I skipped because a long run on Monday fits my schedule better. 98% of the time I won't skip a run . . .

I did an abs workout with my wife this morning . . .I am in good running shape but not in good shape!

I realize that my life is only a breathe. I hope those of you who read this realize that too.

This song puts that in perspective: The band is Passenger. The song is Life's for the Living.

5:20AM

5:20AM
Dark outside
5 miles in 10 minutes

I have to get a physical today so nothing to eat or drink until 1:00pm . . .I do not know suffering.

I went to the Y yesterday. I am still at 177 pounds. Instead of complaining about what I am NOT - -lean and fast . . .I need to be grateful for what I am - -alive.

17 miles in the rain . . .

I ran 17 miles in the pouring rain.

I was not sure if I was mentally tough enough to beat the crap out of myself again for another marathon. Fortunately I jumped over a ton of mental walls this morning. It rained hard enough from miles 9 to 14 that I had to run without my glasses on . . I cannot walk around the block without my glasses on. The interesting thing without not having my glasses on (and not being able to see!) was that it heightened my other senses immensely . . .I will enter the gates of heaven to the smell of wet bark.

Running in the rain for 3 miles is "life" giving. Run 17 miles in the rain is "life" sucking.

I finished this week running 41 miles. 41 miles is alot of miles for me.

When I got home I sat in an ice bath . . . .I tried to freeze my pain! I have 3 phenomenal blisters now as a result of running in wet socks and shoes.

26.2 miles seems like a daunting task.

5:35AM . . .17 miles in 25 minutes

I woke up at 3:45AM to eat a breakfast bar and drink some more water.

When I went to back to bed I started thinking about this website and how stupid it must seem to people who don't know the original intent of it. For those of you (112,000) who have hung on over the last year (including my unknown friends in Germany and Austria!) . . . I started doing this last year as an online training journal. That is still ALL that it is . . this isn't my personal journal, or my autobiography--this website (blog) isn't my anthem to the world - -it is my training journal.

Believe it not . . .my life is much deeper than what makes it to the pages of this website. My life is 200 times deeper than running. Running enriches my life . . but it does not define my life. The LOVE that God has shown me . .to LOVE and BE LOVED .. that defines my life.

With this being said . . .I must leave for a 17 mile journey.

17 miles in 8 hours . . .

8 hours from now I will start on my 17 mile run. It is suppossed to be raining. I will run in the rain Sam I Am. I just finished a HUGE bowl of oatmeal loaded with fruit . . . I took my family for a nice dinner tonight and ordered salad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If I would have eaten crap like I usually do I wouldn't have a good idea tomorrow on my run where I am at physically. This way atleast I will be fueling myself with decent food including a couple of protein bars that I have been jamming down my throat today. I do not take 17 miles lightly.

My plan is to have gels at miles 4.5, 9 and 13.
I need to drink close to 30 ounces.

Miles 9 through 13 are going to be in the park where it is hilly. I need that . . .

Running long distances is really a lifestyle. This is so good for me. You cannot believe how much I have poisoned myself over the years with bad, bad things. I am only a shadow of my former self . ...believe me.

7 today . . .17 tomorrow

2pm
7 miles
over 90 degrees
humidity suffocating

Today was the 2nd toughest run that I have had during this marathon training. I fought demons the whole 7 miles. I couldn't get enough to drink. The water in my handheld water bottle was hot within minutes of going outside. In all honesty, there wasn't a whole lot enjoyable about this run . . .except for that it was TOUGH and I can draw from it at about mile 22 of my marathon when I want to stop and quit.

17 miles tomorrow morning at 6AM. 17 miles! We will see what happens . . .

5:30AM . . .this is where it gets tough

5:30AM
Dark
8 miles
Didn't get home until 9:15 last night
Rough day of work ahead of me

This is the time that I would like to go back upstairs and crawl under my covers. However, I know that in about 15 minutes I'll be pounding the pavement and which each step I'll be improving the quality of my life . . .though the first mile or two may not feel like it.

I went to the Y on Tuesday and Wednesday to run on the treadmill . . .I am still hovering at 177 pounds.

The trains are in surround sound outside my window this early August morning . . .

___________________________________________________________________________
7:19AM
Back from my run. I am a better man physcially, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

This could be it . . .

Everyone who runs knows that we are only one step away from disaster . . . torn acl, blown achilles, stress fractures on anything that can get fractured. With this being the case, I personally do not take ANY run for granted. One of these runs, hopefully later rather than sooner . . .will be my last. If by chance, this morning's 13.1 mile run was the last . . .it would be the perfect one to leave on.

Weather perfect. My body held up perfect. Everything clicked the whole run. My mind was right. My heart was right. I could feel God looking down on me saying, "that's my boy."

It was Heritage Days at the park I run in (where people dress up for 3 days like Civil War Soldiers and Frontier type people and sleep in tents!) . . .I love it . . .I ran through "camp" this morning at about 7:30 . . .it was like I was transported in time running in 1847.

We love Heritage Days because these people have passion! It is refreshing to be around people with passion (even if it's not mine). Tanner said that it feels like a Marathon because everybody is into the same thing . . .good analogy. I think I'll keep him around.

This is what I ran through today:

7 miles in the dark with a hurt heart . . .

5:20AM
7 miles in the dark
Home in time to spend some time with our son who started high school today.
My heart hurts with the passage of time.

2 ties lay on bed in my office.
Left there by a certain 6 year old girl in our house wanting me to dress up to take her to her first day of first grade. Evidently the 2 ties mean that I get to pick!

I ran hard today because my heart hurt for my kids growing up.

Shin Splints . ..

I haven't had shin splints for 5 years. I do now. I am running 7 miles tomorrow morning . . .I am going to run in a different pair of shoes to change my stride. You run different in different shoes . .might be a nice change on some of my overused tendons . . .

I haven't eaten a ton of crap this week. Trying to stay as much away from bread and pop as I can. I am really starting to drink more water and figure out a nutrition/hydration plan. I have read that the dreaded wall is avoidable . . . .however, I am not as scared of it this go around since last time I ran straight into it with no helmet.

It is getting hot again. I am OK with that. If it gets cold I am OK with that too. I am just grateful and praise God that I am alive and able to put one foot in front of the other. ...even if the pace is slow and my body screams at me.

The long run this weekend calls for a Sunday only 13.1 mile run.

This is what I have been listening to: My Body - -Young the Giant (my brother got me into this . . )

1100 miles driving . . .15 miles running

Got back today from South Carolina.

2200 miles driving

I ran 30 miles while I was there. . .including 3 miles last night in Lexington, Kentucky on a treadmill at the Sheraton 4 Points.

Drove 7 hours today . . . Ran 15 miles this afternoon at 3:00pm.
I was fueled by 3 bowls of oatmeal and 40 ounces.
On my run I drank 20 ounces and had a GU at 45 minutes and 90 minutes.

I think I was hallucinating at mile 12 . . .very Pink Floyd-ish.
15 miles is the farthest I have ran in 2012. I feel pretty good. Upon returning home I stretched at my usual spot halfway down the block and then hopped into a cold bath . . .cold as in zero hot water. The cold bath came a lot closer to killing me than the run! I recover 2 times faster when I man up and sit in a cold tub.

I have a ton of insights but not much time to mention them....congratulations to a friend who ran 8 straight hours and ran over 45 miles!!!

South Carolina . . .

I have been in South Carolina this week. I have run every day. It is the kind of hot that sticks to your skin hours after the run is over. I ran on the beach for just a couple of miles the other day . . .far too hard on my ankles so I have run on bike paths, soft beds of pine needles and shady roads under oak trees covered in spanish moss. I am on vacation so my eating hasn't been very good but I have continued with my training. Last day here . . . only 4 miles. I have run 27 miles here in South Carolina. As pretty as it is to run here . . I miss the familiar sights, sounds and country roads of home.

I'm Still Here . . . .

I'm still here pounding out miles in the dark and quiet mornings.

I am to the point in my training (it happened last year) where when I wake up in the morning I dread my run. The mental part of breaking through that barrier is just as important to finishing a marathon as putting in the miles.

It is 5:20AM now . . .it is still dark. I have 6 miles this morning.

The last time I weighed myself (Monday) I was back down to 177.

180 pounds

Went to the Y this morning and worked out.

I weighed in at 180 pounds.

My right knee is swollen. My left hamstring periodically shocks me. I sat in the pool for 45 minutes after work . . .I have 3 miles tomorrow morning. I am going to knock them out before most of the world even thinks about getting up.

I am sad for my son growing up today. I am glad that he is growing up but I wish that I could freeze time. I walked along the driveway to turn off the garage light this morning and froze in my tracks thinking about how this is the same driveway that I taught him to catch. I really haven't changed. The driveway hasn't really changed . . .but he has. I am sad for the passing of time.

5:40AM . . .12 miles in 20 minutes

5:40 AM
12 miles ahead of me.
I let the dog out and the sticky air hangs out on the street waiting for me.

I don't know why I run.
I get butterflies . . even now . . .when I run longer distances like 12 miles.

12 miles is going to hurt. It comes down to a matter of when in the run it is going to start hurting. If it starts hurting at 2 miles I am in trouble! If it holds off until mile 8 or 9 it will be normal.

My life is so much more fulfilling because I run . . .

This is my church before church.

___________________________________
12:55pm

I made it. When I got home and took my shoes and socks off  my toe nail was hanging by a thread. I'll put up a picture soon . . .of the 35,000 daily followers (give or take a few thousand) I know that there are some hardcore runners out there that thrive on a good gore shot like a hanging toenail.

Some highlights of the 12 miler:
Mile 8 I smelled maple syrup.
Mile 9 my left hamstring shocked me as I ran up the "Lake Storey" hill. I don't think it is normal when a muscle goes into "shock" mode!
At mile 11 I lifted the top of my shirt to circulate air and was struck with the realization that a couple of my 150 chest hairs was silver.

I was struck today about how running is the easiest/hardest thing to do. As far as skill . . .we learn it in its simplest form at about 1 1/2 years of age. However, the mental side of repeatedly beating your body step after step for an extended period of time is learned. That part of running is not natural.

I am training myself to once again run 26.2 miles . . . that is MY goal.

In church today I learned (or was once again reminded) that GOD's goal is not MY happiness but to transform me into the likeness of Christ . . . .at all costs.

I praised God almost every step this morning. I DO NOT take my health and this journey that running has given me for granted. I KNOW that both can be taken from me (if it God's will) at any given time . . .but in the meantime . . . .each step, no matter how much it hurts, is a gift - -and I am thankful.

I drank 18 ounces of water (with a Nuun tablet to replace the sodium loss) and 2 gels (mile 4 and mile 9).

4 miles in Des Moines this morning . . .12 tomorrow

6:00AM
Des Moines Iowa
Gray's Lake
4 miles

I loved this run.
I love this place.
I loved looking at new people . . .looking at tall buildings . . . .
I loved getting up early from the comfort of a hotel bed and making myself run.

12 miles tomorrow. . .

This is a view from my run this morning:

it is 6:10pm 102 degrees and I am going to run 6 miles

6:10pm
102 degrees
6 miles
it comes down to this . . . . .you either ARE or you AREN'T tough enough for this run.
_________________________________________________________________

9:28pm
I was tough enough.

3 miles in 7.5 hours

11 mile run in 30 mins . .I ran

5:45AM
Sunday
Sticky
The back of my right knee (my bad knee) is swollen from yesterday's run in the rolling hills. I get nervous when anything with that knee doesn't seem right. With tan legs my incision jumps off of my leg . . .my son thinks I need to tell people that it is a shark bite.

My plan today:
I am going to take a gel at mile 3 and mile 6.
The fuel belt that I am borrowing only has 16 ounces so I am going to re-fill one of the water bottles at the park.

I honestly am not very excited about this journey . . .I will be better when the first sweat comes.

I watched The Descendants last night . . .ouch.
____________________________________________________
6:10pm

Another 11 miler under my belt. Speaking of belts . . . I ran today with my buddies fuel belt . . .I'm OUT. I am bringing it back to him tomorrow. It moved around . . didn't carry enough water for me etc . . . .have something tied to my waist didn't bother me as much as the ackwardness of trying to pull the bottles out. I am either going to go with my handheld 20 ounce bottle or get one of those belts that carries one 20 ounce bottle. It was nice however to have my hands free.

This was a great run. It was hot already . . .

I took a gel at miles 3.5 and mile 7.

I seriously could have ran another 4 or 5 miles.

Couple problem spots:
The arch of my left foot started to rub on the top of my shoes.
My right (bad) knee is still swollen.
My hernia (or strain) or whatever it is (down there) . . . .continues to hurt!!!

I hit my chair outside on the back patio when I got home and iced down and fell asleep!!!

This has been a great weekend for running. I thought alot today on my run about my kids and how I can continue to improve on being their dad. They need a good dad. My wife needs a good husband. The world needs a good man . . .running allows me the time to think about those things.

Rest day tomorrow. Going to the Y in the early morning to workout and then tomorrow night my wife got me a certificate for a full body massage. It will be nice to get un-knotted.

6 miles thu . . .6 miles this morning at our farm

5:30AM

Spent night at my mom's farmhouse last night.
This morning was the best run that I have had all year.
6 miles.
Country road.
No people.
No cars. Smell of wet woods and gravel.
It was the perfect combination of sweat and hurt.
I could have ran straight into heaven this morning.

11 miles tomorrow.
Borrowed my buddies fuel belt to see how I will like it.

Couple of photos from this morning:

I LOVE my Brooks Cascadia's. They are trail shoes but sometimes I run in them on country roads when I can run on the gravel shoulder of the road like I did this morning.

I SKIPPED MY RUN TODAY

I HAD TO TRAVEL FOR MY WORK TODAY AND HAD TO LEAVE AT 4:30am

I SKIPPED MY RUN

I AM GOING TO MAKE IT UP TOMORROW MORNING . . . 6 MILES

I WISH THAT I COULD HAVE THE YEARS 23 TO 35 BACK.

I AM CERTAIN THAT WHEN I FINALLY SHRED MY KNEES THAT GOD WILL PROVIDE ME WITH SOMETHING THAT GIVES ME THE SAME TYPE OF BUZZ THAT RUNNING DOES

I HAVE LISTENED TO THIS RYAN ADAMS SONG 12 TIMES TODAY:

I AM READING THIS BOOK AGAIN FOR ABOUT THE 5TH TIME:

5:15AM . . new weight 177 pounds!

It is 5:15AM
I have just 3 miles ahead.
3 miles seem like a marathon to me right now as I am still half asleep, it is dark down here and the tick of the grandfather clock and the low hum of the trains lull me back to sleep.

This is the part of me that I like. The part that will overcome the temptation to go lay on the couch, turn on the TV  and sleep for another 30 minutes. It is mornings like these that the "run" becomes much more than 3 miles . . .this is the "journey" part of training for something that most people can't overcome.

If only I could carry this discipline into other aspect of my life . . . .

I weighed in at 177 yesterday!!!!!!!!!!!!!
__________________________________
6:15AM

I'm back.
3.5 miles  . . .I ran a half mile further because I had a medium chocolate malt last night.
I cranked it the whole run . . .AND . . . .did 40 pushups when I got done. I have been stuck on 35! I want to go into this marathon FIT . . not just running fit but fit.

I didn't really think about anything this run . . . .I praised God for things and sucked in the morning. If this is my last day . . this was a good day to start it out.

10 miles this weekend

Saturday
100 degrees!
4 miles
Hardest run in the heat I have ever had. I had to stop 4 times.

Sunday
80 degrees
4pm
6 miles
One of the best runs of the year. I felt fresh, fit and light. I am wearing my new shoes now. I thought I was forming a blister but today it felt ok. For the most part, nothing really hurt today. I am looking forward to going to the Y to weigh myself tomorrow.

This was my 3rd week of marathon training. This Coldplay song has been dominating my brain waves:

96 degrees July 4th run

Sat by the pool from 11am to 3:30pm

96 degrees
4:00pm
5 miles

I drank about 16 ounces.
I could smell people's grills.
I have been done running for 20 minutes and can't quit sweating.
I ran down the highway (150) to torture myself even more with no trees.
I am tougher than 5 miles in 96 degree heat . . .not sure if I am tougher than ten though.
I am going to wear my new shoes on tomorrow's 3 mile run. I wore a new pair of Smartwool socks today . . .there is nothing better than a new pair of socks. I am fairly certain that God will meet me in heaven with a pair of Smartwools in hand . . .

9.3 miles

5:30AM
9.3 miles
I started sweating within feet from leaving my front door.
I ran hard for 9.3 miles.
I got back and iced, drank a cup of coffee, ate a half a banana, popped 3 ibuprofen and started my day.
I am quite certain that I have some sort of sports hernia, groin tear etc . . .I had a hernia as a boy. It is not one of my cooler injuries . . .especially when I stand up and ice falls out of my shorts. You can only imagine how cool my 14 year thinks that is.

12 hours later . . .I feel good.
Tomorrow is a rest day and I hate rest days.

This is the song that hit me the hardest this 9.3 mile Sunday . . .Kanye and Coldplay "Homecoming"

It is 5:13AM . . I don't want to run.

Sunday
5:13AM
9 miles ahead of me.
I don't want to go.
My feet ache from trail running in the mud yesterday.
It is hot outside already.
It is at precisely this moment that separates the talkers from the do-ers. My life is more than
half over, I don't want to be a talker.

I gave my marathon shoes away . . .

My office is filled with old running shoes. "Old" in that they all have 500 miles on them. However none of them look old.

The shoes that led me on my first 26.2 mile journey found a new home last night. I gave them to my step dad. Instead of spending the rest of their size 11 life sitting on the shelf with 10 other pairs . . .I gave them away. Instead of wasting away remembering all of the training runs, rainy runs and ultimately the BIG run . .they have a new purpose now. I am sure in a day or two . .they will be mowing a lawn, going out to eat, being paired with jeans, maybe khaki shorts . . .they gave me a good life . . .I am sure they will give him one too.

11 miles Tue. Wed. Thur.

11 miles so this week.
I have 5 miles today . . .I am going to run on trails.
I have 9 miles tomorrow.
It has been 100 degrees two days in a row here and today and tomorrow will be close to the same.

I am running out of time.
You are running out of time.
People I know and have known are dying.

This week I let the pressures of my work dictate my thoughts while I was running. I hate that. Running is a form of escapism for  me . . the same reason people read fiction I guess. 3 miles into a run I don't want to be having conversations in my head about work . . .I just want TO BE.

I need to weigh myself . . .

Days 6 and 7 . . .

Saturday
Trail run with my son.
Hills. Hot. I wish that I could bottle up the smell of the woods.
2.5 hilly miles

Today
8 miles
95 degrees and humid
On a scale of 1 to 10 . . .this run had to be a 9 on degree of difficulty.

At mile 6 I stopped at the public pool and dunked my head. I don't think the mothers at the pool were impressed. My hip held up alright. It is barking now.
I immediately iced my hip, my butt, my knees when I got home.

I listened to The Killers. I wanted to stop several times it was so hot. I kept having to tell myself one more step . . .one more step.  I drank almost 20 ounces of water.

I am going to lift weights tomorrow morning and weigh in . . I wasn't a very good boy this weekend . . .several rounds of eating crap and about 4 Blue Moons . . .although I put an orange in the Blue Moon which made it healthier . . .

Before most runs I focus on who I want to be as a follower of God, as a husband, as a dad, as aprofessional - -I try to think about what it feels like, what it looks like to be that person . . .I am convinced every mile gets me closer. That's why I don't skip runs. I don't want to short change myself. Today for instance . . .this run was much more than just 8 miles in the 95 degree heat.

I'm turning into my grandma . . .

6:20AM
Saturday
My left hip hurts. My toe hurts. My tooth hurts. I am losing a toe nail already. Sound like a grandma don't I?

Day off yesterday. I bought another pair of shoes yesterday. My 4th pair . . .Mizuno Wave Nirvana 8's . . . .size 11. Tanner gets mad at me for buying the same shoe every time . . .when Tanner gets 43 he can buy whatever kind of shoes he wants to buy.

Yesterday
Banana
2 bagels with peanut butter
 3 pieces of pizza and some chips

Tanner is running in a 5K this morning. We are then going to go to Jubilee State Park and run/hike. After that, we are going to Running Central, Bushwackers (cool outdoor store), Bass Pro Shop, Starbucks, Sully's Pub downtown for lunch . . . .Full day.

 Tonight I am going to enjoy a nice Blue Moon with an orange under a full moon in the country.

Back to me sounding like my grandma, I have already popped ibuprofen this morning and I haven't even run yet . . . ..this hip thing sucks.

If I start name dropping Calvin Klein during some of these posts . . .there has been some interest on their part of me doing some side work for them . . .they are trying to get me to do some underwear print ads for them but I am still reluctant.

THESE ARE MY NEW SHOES. MIZUNO WAVE NIRVANA 8

Marathon Training Day 3 - 3 miles

6:00AM
Rainy
3 miles
Left butt cheek and left toe hurt the whole time. Yes, butt cheek is the medical term.

I am back on the popping ibuprofen bandwagon! They start to taste like tic tacs after awhile.

I have a break today (Friday).
I don't want a break.
I haven't logged enough miles to really need a break.
However . . .. I have learned that rest days are crucial to fitness.

My training calls for 5 miles on Saturday and 8 miles on Saturday. I would like 5 on the trails (outside Peoria) and the 8 miles somewhere by myself early.

This is what I ate:

Banana

Bag of mixed nuts

2 chicken legs
a couple of potatoes
salad
2 rolls
2 chocolate chip cookies

2 bowls of Rice Krispies

4:45AM Day 2 Marathon training . . .

4:45AM
Me and a 14 year old boy who shares the same last name as I do ran 5 miles this morning at 4:45AM.
It was hot and windy. After 2.5 miles I dropped in the middle of the road and did 35 pushups. My son has lived with me too long to be impressed by me. So has his mother . . . .I on the other hand think I am cool . . .and that is really all that matters considering I live with me alot more than they live with me.

Only 3 miles tomorrow.
The Smashing Pumpkins have a new album coming out . .without even hearing it I bet that it will be the theme album of my second marathon.

Ate like an idiot again today . .

Banana

Subway for lunch

Snickers

Wendy's
2 Jr Cheeseburgers
Chicken Sandwich
Fries

I didn't burn enough calories today to eat all of this crap an hour before I go to sleep! My discipline when it comes to food is  . . . .zero.

Oh . . . .a couple of days ago I wrote about how boring my brother thinks my writing is. I mentioned I didn't know if anybody read this (I actually know HOW many people do because of the stats) . . .thank you for your words of encouragement . . .even those of you who sent me notes in languages that I don't understand (750 different notes and comments from readers worldwide). Who knew that I was BIG in Indonesia. Sleep on THAT little brother . . . .

Maybe 750 is a stretch . . .

I listened to this song 4 times today while I was driving .. .

Horse Feathers
A Heart Arcane

Day 1 of 18 weeks of training . . .

5:45AM
3 miles
Ran hard
Hated every minute of it.

35 pushups
banana for breakfast

ham and cheese sandwich for lunch

3 hot dogs and chips for supper

When I was running I was thinking about a guy I know who is battling cancer and I thought about him playing in the backyard as a young boy having no idea that one day he would be laying in a bed fighting for his life. I think it is better that young boys do not know.

Marathon training started today . . .

5:15AM
YMCA
I weighed in at 180.4 pounds.
My goal is to weight in the 160's.

When I started training last year at this time for the Quad Cities Marathon I weighed 181 pounds- - -I got down to 174 pounds.


With one marathon under my belt . . .this will be a different training experience for me. I am not training to see if I can finish (because I know that I can) . . I am training so that I can run 26.2 miles feeling fit and healthy. There is a difference. Last year I wasn't in great shape . .I made it based on shear determination. This year I want to cross the finish line fit enough to run another 5 miles if I had to.

Father's Day . . .

I am going to trail run at my dad's this afternoon. It will be in the mid 90's. Tanner is going to skip this run as he ran 8 miles on Friday (!) and has another 5 tomorrow for his high school cross country team.

I drove in the country this morning with Tanner. He asked me if this day was any different for me. It is not. I would be a pretty bad dad if I tried harder today than any other day . . .I would also be a pretty bad son if I tried harder.

I am going to start training for the Des Moines Marathon on Tuesday.

I was reading the bible this morning and came across this . . . basically, it is saying that you need to carry the same self discipline into your christian walk as you do your athletic training.

1 Corinthians 9:25-27

New International Version (NIV)

²⁵ Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. ²⁶ Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. ²⁷ No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

More later . . .

8:45PM
5 miles
85 degrees
straight up and down hills on a hard road out in the country at my dad's house. Instead of trail running by myself I walked them with my son.

Several trucks passed me as I was running . . .if I got ten bucks for every "your a dumb ass" look I got I wouldn't have to go to work tomorrow.
I think I have a hernia. My stepmom told my wife that I have to get it checked out. I am starting to train for the Des Moines Marathon tomorrow . . better be an in-out surgery.

I'm still breathing . . . .

Been awhile since I've been on here.
I have run almost every day for a week.
I saw another coyote yesterday at 6:00AM . . .
My brother says that my website is boring.
I think that he might be right.
My brother thinks that I pose for my pictures.
I think that he might be right.

I will get motivated very soon to use colorful adjectives and action verbs to write about my running and how it makes my life complete. However . . .. I write for a living . . .and so sometimes this seems like a chore. And then I think . . . .why do I do this anyway? Does anyone really read this? And then my brother texts me and tells me that it is boring . .which means that I have a reader . . . .and it is my brother . . .. so I will continue to write boring, useless information  . . .if for no other reason than to piss him off.

On a more cheerful note . . . .my butt hurts. I pulled something in the half marathon and every couple of days it gives me twinges of pain. I am going to trail run this weekend. I am going to run 4 miles tomorrow morning at 4:45AM.

I am quite certain that I am going to sign up for the Des Moines Marathon this weekend. If so,my training will start next week. It is an 18 week plan.

Man he is right . . .this IS boring.

But this song by The Killers isn't:

Ran 4th Half Marathon today . .

Galesburg Half Marathon Express

8AM start
felt like 70's
hot and hilly

I didn't plan on either.

I finished.....I was trained for about 13.1 miles! If it was 14 miles I may have been in trouble! I talked with a ton of cool people.

More importantly . . . .our son had a great 5k race. HE is the one with a future in running. I don't have a future in running .. I just run. He, on the other hand . . . .

As usual, I have been cramping like a mad man! My family doesn't even pay attention anymore as they see me hop around the house, hop around the yard, in the garage . . . when my calves cramp you better get out of the way because I move fast!! Everything will be fine and then boom . . .. . the calves get rock solid and I am on the ground running, hopping, screaming . . .IT IS AWESOME to shock your body to the point of pissing it off even 7 hours after running.

I'm not sure what it next . .going to the Y tomorrow. I really am not in very good shape. I am either going to sign up for the Des Moines Marathon or a 50K in Nebraska. Either way . . .I will be running on Tuesday and I can't wait. . . .

Our son finished 1st in the 19 and under age group in the 5k .. his goal was to run sub 7 minute miles and he did. At our house, we set goals based on time not placement . . .if he ran sub 7 minute miles and finished 110th it wouldn't matter . . .he hit his goal. He will get more fulfillment out of running that way. I was way TOO hard of a charger when I was younger and as a result had moments of self destruction .. I don't want that for him!

90 minutes to half marathon. ..

6:30AM
I have no idea what to expect out there today.
Nervous anticipation . .this is what makes my world go around.

__________________________________________________________

Half Marathon Tomorrow

I haven't run since Thursday morning.

I don't feel like I am in very good shape. With this being said, I am looking forward to running 13.1 miles tomorrow. I always look forward to running new routes, sweating, pushing myself. . .this time though it cost me $75.00!


The Health blog on the  New York Times said that if you have had ACL surgery and you run that it could take as little as ten years to sideline you forever. I have been running for 7 years. . . .whereas there may be some truth to that (for some people) . . .it only has motivated me to do another marathon, a 50k, a 50 miler and then a 100 miler. I understand that these are just words on a page until I starting crossing these off my list . . . .

Though I have ran in 3 half marathons and have run over 13 miles several times . . . .make no mistake about it . .13.1 miles is a long ways. I ALWAYS respect the distance . .regardless of the distance.

It is 4:30AM

It is 4:30AM

I am trying to prepare myself for a 12 mile run.

5 minutes ago I was in my bed dreaming.

In 5 more minutes I will be on the street running and running. . .and running.

I have tried to talk myself into postponing this run until tomorrow . . .so I can go back to bed for the next 1:45 and dream. But I can't . .. For some reason I don't have much will power when it comes to eating but when it comes to knowingly going outside in a matter of minutes and beating the crap out of myself I blindly follow

It is now 8:45PM

I ran 12 miles and was home at 6:40AM

I drove 300 miles today for my work

It was hot today.

Finally signed up for Sunday's half marathon.

This evening I sat on my front porch drinking a Blue Moon listening to the low rumble of thunder thinking how lucky I am to have the God of the thunder watch over me and my little family.

My run was good. My legs have ached today and I feel a little beat up but I kicked this 12 mile run right in the face this morning and for that . . . I will sleep good.

I listened to The First Aid Kit, Ryan Adams and The Lumineers ALL day today. This is the song that will pop into my head tonight when I wake up in the middle of the night .it is called Ghost Town.

Chicago . . .

I have been racking up the miles this week.

5:15AM
70 degrees
3 miles

Chicago today and tomorrow. I am looking forward to running with my son in the morning through the city and to the lake.

I still have not signed up for the half marathon next Sunday . . .not sure why.

My heart is sad for the brevity of life. My heart is sad for hearts so sad that they must take their own life.

I just discovered the band "First Aid Kit" last night sitting in my chair flipping through the channels. They are going to make my half marathon playlist . . .I'm certain if they found that out they would reture knowing that their career has hit its pinnacle . . .

4.5 miles tonight . . .

A rare run in the evening . . .

7:00pm
4.5 miles
80 degrees
I could smell what people were having for supper and I could smell lawns being mowed.

Runs like tonight were what got me addicted to this 7 short years ago.

This is the song that got me through my 275 mile day:
(Iron and Wine)

I ran 11 miles this morning . . .

5:30AM
Me
God
16 ounces of water and about 6 tic tacs.
I left at 5:30 and got home at 7:05
I hit one hill at about mile 7.

I am fairly certain that I have a strained groin . .. it is not pulled as I have had that before. This is not a very "cool" injury.

I liked "me" today as I pushed on through the quiet morning. Putting the demons at bay as they crept up . . .I hit the "hill" pissed off and was re-energized when I reached the top.

I scared a doe by the college and watched it run up in front of me for a quarter mile or so . . .it would turn periodically to make sure I wasn't gaining ground - I wasn't!

At about mile 7 my legs started to fill up with lead.

I finished my run strong. Walked the half block to the "wall" and stretched. Warmed up day old coffee, sat on the front porch and put ice down the front of my shorts trying to numb my strained groin (my wife was REALLY not impressed by that move either ).

I ate a peanut butter sandwich . . .downed 3 Motrin and will move on with my day.

I am not in very good shape. My gut is jiggly. My groin hurts. My knees are shot. My hairline is receding as we speak. I have a blister on my right foot that is black . . .but I still have enough fight in me to wake up at 4:45AM on a Sunday morning and run 11 miles so that I can spend the rest of the day with my kids . . . .so take that demons.

This is the song that I was listening to when I started up the hill: (It's by Neon Trees)

My day . . .

Strawberry Shortcake coffee
Walk downtown with my wife
Cleaned my mom's store . . .realized that a person could read every book in the world and the bible 1,000 times but if a person never experienced the living God for themselves then all of that is merely words on a page.
Farmers Market. Cold Chai Tea and iced green tea.
Lawn mowed. Little baby bunnies scared out of their nests . . .
nap
ping pong
Discussion with my wife whether I am going to run the Des Moines Marathon in September or The North Face Endurance Challenge (31 miles) in Kansas City in November. Discussion didn't go too well!!!
trail run by myself for 45 minutes in the 90 degree heat.
Dad's house in the country.
Ride on the Mule.
Hammock.
Pizza
Fishing . .Tanner caught 6 bass in 15 minutes.
Chorus of frogs.
Read old letters my Great Grandparents wrote to each other.
25 minute drive home in the dark night on country roads with deer, crickets and humidity.
Bon Iver through the speakers . . kids that call me "dad" and a wife that still loves me after all of these years.
11 mile run at 5:30AM tomorrow morning . .it is 10:30pm . . .I must sleep.

This is one of my favorite bands . .The Lumineers.

his song was the theme song for my day:

Bon Iver
Holocene

5 miles . . .5AM

5AM
5 miles
Country road
had church at mile 3 watching the sunrise.


I think that I am going to run the Quad Cities Marathon again in the fall.
I am going to get up even earlier tomorrow to run 3 miles.
My life is complicated . . .running makes it OK.
I have an 11 mile run scheduled for this weekend . . .

I have been thinking about this Hootie and the Blowfish song today. It reminds me of when our son was born. It seems as though I have lived a hundred different lives, I miss all of them.

9.3 on a Tuesday

4:50AM
55 degrees
9.3 miles
I can't think of a better way to start a work day.
I ran my weekend route on a weekday . . .I felt like I was cheating.

At about 5:45AM I saw a ball of fire through the trees . . .when I hit the clearing it was bouncing off of the lake.

All I could do was look up and say, "Thank You."


I pulled this book off of my library shelf and started reading it. I am highlighting cool lines and phrases every 2nd paragraph.

6am Saturday

It is 6AM.
My training does not call for a run this morning but I do.
Short 2 miles. Slow. No music. Enough to start a sweat and get the cobwebs out.
I am not very good with life when the cobwebs dangle.

Stubborn Love . . .

Stubborn Love.
Can't get this song out of my head.
It's by The Lumineers.

I ran Tuesday and this morning at 5:15AM. At 5:15 it is just becoming light and the birds are just waking up. 5 miles yesterday. 2.5 miles today. I got a new Brooks Night Lite running jacket. It is green and very amphibious. My favorite part of my run is the end when I walk the half block to the "wall" and stretch. I have not been injured in a long time and am convinced that the "wall" has something to do with that. I'll post a picture tomorrow . . . . because everybody out there I am sure is dying to see a picture of the brick wall that I stretch my quads and hams on.

This is the song that is repeating itself in my mind:

10 miles yesterday

Sunday
1:00pm
85 degrees
humid
10 miles
Got real dizzy at mile 7 and felt like I just shotgunned 14 beers.
After 5 minutes and showering in the drinking fountain I continued on.
This 10 miles in the heat was a big internal, mental victory for me. I wanted to stop several times and pushed through it.

Went to the Y this morning . . .

5 miles tomorrow morning . . .I am going to watch the sunrise.

cobwebs and mud.

3 miles on the trails.

85 degrees.

Sweat.

Cobwebs.

Mud.

Water.

Ran with my son.

If this was my last day on earth (and it may be) this was a good way to spend it.

10 miles tomorrow . . . .85 degrees. The battle is on!

Quiet week on the pavement . . .

It has been a quiet week on the pavement. I've racked up a few miles this week but have racked up even more calories.

I am going to run trails tomorrow and have a 10 miler scheduled as part of my training on Sunday.

I have not run 10 miles since my marathon.
I welcome the agony.

9 miles in the rain

12:55pm - 2:20pm
9 miles
50 degrees
rain the whole time

I battled stomach problems, drenched clothes, rain covered glasses . . .for 9 blissful miles. I needed to beat my demons and I did today. I needed to beat through some of my lethargic tendencies and today I did.

There is nothing like the smell of wet bark and the sting of sweat salt in the eyes. I very well could have sat on the couch today . . .but if I did I wouldn't have "lived" this Sunday on country roads and had the day etch itself into my memory. I also would have kick myself for punking out of a 9 mile run. I won today on several fronts.

I read this in Esquire today. It is a quote from Kevin Costner. This answer could have been my answer . . . .my wife wishes I had more in common with Kevin Costner than just the answer to this question!

KEVIN COSTNER IN ESQUIRE MAGAZINE

I know what I know and it's not enough. I know that when I die, I'm going to miss a lot of great books and a lot of great music that I'll never hear. I'm going to miss seeing my children's children. I'll miss boyfriends and husbands who I'm going to be absolutely dependent on to treat my children with respect and grace, and take care of them and honor them. That's what I'm going to miss.

This song has been in my head today. It is by The Civil Wars:

I am 43 years old today . . .

It is 4:34AM.
I have been awake since 3:00AM.
I am 43 years old today.
I went to a funeral yesterday for a guy I knew . . .. he was 43 years old. His father had his head down the whole time during the funeral. All I could see was his sobbing, shaking shoulders from behind. I am sad for that family.

I have 4 miles today.
I have 9 miles tomorrow.

My kids are more excited for my birthday than I am. . .
I do not deserve them.
I do not deserve my wife.
I tell them all that I love them a hundred times per day.
They do the same for me.